2 Months Until Retirement, or: the Importance of Taking Action

Prior to getting married, Ryan and I attended premarital counseling at our Unitarian Universalist church. I don’t remember how I felt about attending counseling, but since we were still in the time period we deemed “la la land” (aka: lizard brain/honeymoon phase), I’d imagine it felt a bit unnecessary? Nevertheless, we signed up and attended several sessions with the woman who would later marry us, Rev. Robin Tanner.

I wonder now what she saw when she spoke to us. We were making a huge decision, as marriage is for everyone, but we also had other factors to consider. Ryan has two kids. I never wanted children. Ryan had a house in the suburbs. I swore I’d never live there again after leaving to go to undergrad. I was in my early 30s at the time and had spent my 20s living and traveling in other countries, often alone. Ryan had been married during his 20s, settling into coupledom that eventually didn’t work out. All of these obvious differences didn’t feel so obvious at the time- or really like any big deal. We were in love, everyone!

Even though Reverend Robin was my age, she was wise beyond her (our) years. I’d imagine she saw right through our haze of honeymoon phase love to the truth- we were very different people, and that would present challenges for us. Instead of lecturing us on this, she did something very smart- she asked us to take the Myers Briggs personality tests, and bring our results to the following session.

Sheesh. There it was, in black and white- we felt, acted and behaved in opposing ways to each other. We were well and truly opposites.

We’ve talked about this moment so many times in the intervening years- how helpful it was and continues to be, to understand that our brains and hearts often work in contrasting ways. This was so hard those first few years- but over time, we learned how to recognize when this was happening, laugh it off and move forward together. Thanks, Rev. Robin!

One of the biggest ways that we are opposites is the amount of time needed to take an action. For me, it is around .0002 seconds from decision made to action taken. Ryan likes to say that I’m in the 95th percentile for speed of taking actions. (Gotta love that gold star validation). For him it takes a few days, maybe? A few weeks?

You’d think this would cause tension, and you’d be right! At least it used to. Now we view it as a strength- a way we can balance each other out. He encourages me to think a bit more about what I’m about to do, I encourage him to get it off his plate so it doesn’t take up brain space. I’m grateful for this.

So how does this relate to FI?

Here’s the thing about anything you want to improve in your life- at some point, hopefully sooner rather than later, you’ve got to take an action towards your goal.

So, if your goal is to get out of debt, you could:

1. create a debt payoff plan (today), then

2. automate your debt payments, then

3. celebrate the milestones along the way!

Or, if your goal is to save your emergency fund, you could:

1. calculate how much you’ll need (3-6 months of expenses, not salary), then

2. open a high yield savings account expressly for your emergency fund, then

3. automate your savings to go to that account!

Or, if your goal is reach financial independence, you could:

1. calculate your FI number using the 4% “rule” (yearly spending x 25), then

2. read this article by Ramit Sethi, and follow the steps, then

3. take one action each day this week that follow his Ladder of Personal Finance

Here are some things that feel like action, but are not:

1. Posting about it/liking someone else’s post on social media

2. Listening to another podcast when you already have the information you need to move forward

3. Making another spreadsheet

4. Checking accounts

If you need more on any of these topics, please reach out or check out the Resources page!

---

And with just under two months to go until we say goodbye to these sweet W2s, things are feeling a bit harried around here. Ryan is trying to organize a family visit to coincide with his upcoming but as of yet unscheduled retirement party, all while busy interviewing for and hiring his replacement. I’m closing out the school year and planning end of year celebrations for the amazing tutors and students I work with. Nostalgia is already sneaking in.

Question for today: are you working towards one of the three goals above, or do you have a different financial goal you’re focusing on? What are the current actions you are taking in alignment with that goal?

Let me know in the comments below!